COUNSELOR'S CORNER: A resurrected life

By Fred Cavaiani Easter, the great Christian celebration was two days ago. Passover, the great Jewish celebration just finished also. Both of these religious celebrations commemorate the theme of new life and resurrected life. It is a deep seated longing inside of each us to live on a higher plane of existence. All of us have a desire to live forever. Most of us would like to live a life "resurrected" from worries and concerns about money, sickness, emotional and physical struggles. I once saw a business card of a home remodeling business called "Residential Resurrections." What a great title and accurate description of the business. Christians celebrate the Resurrection of Christ with the hope that each person will rise to a new life that will last forever. They believe that this Christ is active and alive in everyone's life to help each person rise from pain and struggle to a new life of peace and love and that this new 'resurrected" life will "Pass Over into an eternal life at the moment of death. The Jewish Passover theme contains many of the same elements. Freedom, Salvation, Peace, Joy and a Loving union with God that will never end is the annual memorial celebration in most religious circles. In some ways it almost seems like it is built into the psychic DNA of every human being. This theme seems to be the bond among all believers in the many varied religious denominations throughout the world. Each spring the plants, trees and flowers 'resurrect' again into freshness, beauty and energy. The sun again shines bright in the heavens warming us and lifting our spirits. Hibernating animals wake up and come out of their dens. Sometimes 'emotionally hibernating human beings' wake up again to a resurrected life. Easter, Passover and Spring have come again. New life and Resurrected life begin once more. A "Resurrected Life" is the daily challenge of all of us. It is a challenge to live on a more honest and open experience of life. It is an embracing what is before us to discover something deeper at each moment of life. It means to pay close attention to whatever we are doing or experiencing. In this very attentive state of existence something profound happens to us. It is called Resurrection. It means we pass over from superficial glances to profound experiences. There is a deeper meaning in every event, every person and every experience. The Resurrection comes in the ability to pay reflective and close attention to the moment and to whomever and whatever is before us. There is also another principle in living a resurrected life. It is the principle of loving relationships. Two days ago some close friends of ours exemplified this principle. They had an Easter gathering, an evening dinner for friends, most of whom had family and children out of town for Easter. It was a gathering of old friends in an atmosphere of love and kindness. A resurrected life also has an open heart to everyone and embraces those around us with love. This loving couple exemplified a resurrected life in inviting friends who may have been alone this Easter to their home for a Easter meal. Gatherings of family and friends on holidays, birthdays, and simply just to be together are symbols of a resurrected life. As our family gathered together with the grandchildren on Saturday for an Easter egg hunt at the nursing home where my brother-in-law resides, the cheerfulness and spontaneity of these little kids with their parents and grandparents beaming brightly watching them, a resurrected life begin happening among the residents of this nursing home. The freshness and smiles of the children brought joy to the elderly residents. Spring had come to the nursing home. Yet this visit brought a resurrection to us visiting this nursing home. We were all in a loving relationship at this moment and a relationship of giving positive attention to another person always brings new life. Attentive relationships and attentive reflection bring new life and new hope. Negativity and criticism blocks the energy of new life from penetrating our psyche and soul. When I avoid being loving and attentive to another person and to the moment in front of me, it is like I am pulling a dark shade down on my life which blocks any sunlight from shining on me. Whatever religion or absence of religion there is in your life, there is always a resurrection waiting to happen. Pay close attention to relationships and loving reflective of what is before you and you will discover new life that is filled with joy and satisfaction. You will be surprised where this resurrected life will take you. The more loving we become and the more reflective we become, the more wonder we will discover. Hope will become stronger and the belief that it can last forever will have depth. It is worth it to live a resurrected life. ---------------- Fred Cavaiani is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Psychologist with a private practice in Troy. He is the founder of Marriage Growth Center, a consultant for the Detroit Medical Center, and Henry Ford Medical Center. He conducts numerous programs for groups throughout Southeastern Michigan. His column in the Legal News runs every other Tuesday. He can be reached at (248)362-3340. His e-mail address is: Fredcavi@yahoo.com and his website is fredthecounselor.com. Published: Tue, Apr 26, 2011