Kalaska: Michigan couple helps raise 130 foster kids; Saying goodbye is the hardest part

By Vanessa McCray Traverse City Record-Eagle KALKASKA, Mich. (AP) -- Rhonda Wurtz vividly recalls the foster child who, upon moving in, told her with relief, "It's not like 'Annie.'" She and husband Stephen found a passion in providing foster care --and some safety and stability for children. Their big Kalkaska house has a welcoming front porch, an American flag flapping in the breeze and a yard dotted with colorful toys. The house has been home to numerous foster children. Rhonda estimated she's taken in nearly 130 foster children, including emergency placements and short, temporary stays. She first started providing foster care downstate after reading a newspaper article about the need for more foster homes. It clicked, and she thought, "This is my calling." "I've always loved working with kids," she said. Later, she provided care as a single foster parent before marrying Stephen. Both have grown biological children of their own. Stephen is self-employed; Rhonda works part time. Currently, they have five foster children, including a group of four siblings. The Wurtzes are licensed to care for children from birth to age 18. "We've picked them up right from the hospital," Stephen said. An average stay for a foster child is several months to up to a year, the couple said. During that time, the Wurtzes try to give children opportunities, like playing sports or taking a vacation. The couple has traveled with foster children to Europe, California and on regular spring break trips to Florida. It's not a necessity, but it's a nicety. Some of the kids had never left the state, Rhonda said. They also work with older foster children on tasks from laundry to driver training. The Wurtzes expect teens to participate in Michigan Youth Opportunities Initiative, which teaches money management and other life skills. The family developed a habit of asking thought-provoking questions at dinner and making sure everyone listens to one another's responses. Rhonda's daughter Andrea Wood, 23, was brought up with foster siblings from the time she was 6 years old. "It really just became normal. That was just how our family was. There are many definitions of family," said Wood, who lives in Fort Myers, Fla. Wood said she also learned at an early age "that we are not all born on this level playing field" and that you can forge a relationship with someone from a different background. "The hardest part is, they do become your siblings, and you are a family, but it is not permanent, and you know that," Wood said. Saying goodbye to foster children is difficult, the Wurtzes said. They watched babies start to crawl and walk and keep in touch with many children after they leave. Rhonda recently attended a baby shower for a foster daughter. There were more than 16,000 children in foster care statewide as of Sept. 30, according to the Michigan Department of Human Services. There's always a need for more people to become foster parents, a message the state delivers in May during National Foster Care Month. It's something the Wurtzes encourage. Rhonda suggested those interested reach out to someone who has been a foster parent, ask questions and go through training. "People just need to dig into their heart," Rhonda said. "You always feel better about yourself when you do for others." Published: Wed, Jun 8, 2011